Resurrection Story: Ryan and Rachel
Posted By: Nick Hoag
In May members of the Dwell Community have been sharing their stories - real-life stories of struggle, life, redemption, love, and resurrection. This is one such story.
SUMMER
Ryan: My first impression of Rachel was reading her testimony. I identified with her struggles and sense of God’s rescuing love. I have heard hundreds of testimonies before, but hers impacted me deeply, even romantically. She was attractive to me, yet we had never met and all I knew about her was that Jesus was now the center of her identity. Our parents had been friends for years and had even suggested that we meet each other, but I brushed it off as another arranged meeting that would be disappointing. I had been praying for a life partner for years and realized that whenever the special woman arrived, God would have to arrange it and make it abundantly clear. Already, Rachel had my attention. When we met on her baptism day, I was even more impressed. She had a maturity that caught me by surprise and an openness that permitted our relationship to be molded.
Rachel: Last summer I spent long periods of time reading devotionals and talking with God. I had just returned to faith and was learning a lot about my identity in Christ. I was also writing my testimony for Dwell Church’s website since I was getting baptized at the end of August. I felt God was opening my eyes to His purpose for marriage and a spouse. I thought a lot about the characteristics I wanted in a husband, and I asked God to bring someone into my life who exhibited these traits.
One night I listened to a message by Allistair Begg on the Book of Ruth. Mr. Begg talked about marriage and how parents generally give good advice on whom their children should date. My parents had mentioned their friends’ son, Ryan Guilfoy, on more than one occasion. But Ryan was 33 yeas old… so I always ignored the idea. (I had decided never to date anyone more than 10 years older than I.) After listening to Mr. Begg’s message, I was reminded of my parents’ comments about Ryan. I remember talking to God and letting Him know they were clearly off the mark with their suggestion. Suddenly I got the impression that Ryan could be just the man I had been praying for. Although the reason wasn’t terribly clear at the time, God placed Ryan’s name on my heart. From then on I prayed for him… and his future wife.
FALL
Ryan: We spoke only briefly at the baptism celebration, but there was a spark of interest for both of us. Our families got together a couple of times in the week following Rachel’s baptism and it was enough to launch our friendship. Just before she left for school, I suggested Rachel send updates so that I could be praying for her. Starting the next day, we began writing letters to each other through email. It was wonderful! We learned so much about one another over that first month. Rachel visited again in October and we confessed our attraction to one another. We began dating! The letter writing continued with a couple of weekend visits in between. At Thanksgiving our families were together for the entire week. One of my favorite aspects of this gift from God is the friendship between our families.
Rachel: I returned to Vermont excitedly awaiting my baptism. I knew Ryan and his parents would be there, but I tried not to think too much about it. I was just excited to express my love and faith towards God at this ceremony. However, while at the ceremony, Ryan was still on my mind. I felt like God was calling him to my attention. We spoke briefly after the baptism and I felt a connection to Ryan I had never experienced before. I got to know Ryan a little more during the week following the baptism. There was definitely a connection between us, but I really wanted to let God orchestrate our relationship if it was His will. Ryan gave me his email address so we could stay in contact while I was at school. I had asked God to put someone in my life to help me stay accountable while I was at school and Ryan was my answered prayer! I emailed him as soon as I arrived in Providence. The first month Ry and I learned a lot about each other and our relationship deepened. I really got to know him and his heart through our correspondence. God showed me that this man He had placed on my heart over the summer was going become my husband. Although I didn’t know how and when this was going to pass, I clung to the promise God had given me.
WINTER
Ryan: Christmas came and with it the undeniable confidence that our relationship was provided and intended by our loving God. Although we had been talking “long-term” since the beginning of our relationship, we finally spoke our love for one another in January. Once I told Rachel that I loved her, it was clear that I should ask her to be my wife. The question was: When and how?
Thank God for a father’s perspective! My dad listened to my thoughts and feelings and encouraged me to move ahead without hesitation. First I wanted to ask Rachel’s father, Brian, for her hand in marriage. And I wanted to do it face to face. Her parents had moved to Texas by then and I was determined to visit them without Rachel knowing. Everything seemed to line up for a quick trip and God protected and honored my travel, including the weather patterns, which seemed to affect all planes except for my flights. Rachel’s parents were thrilled with the engagement plans. (Of course, Rachel still had to say yes!)
After my trip to Texas, I became focused on a suitable ring for my love. I had a beautiful ring that used to belong to my grandmother and I wanted Rachel to have it, but I became caught up with the idea of creating something of my own. I worked with a jeweler to design a new setting. However, on the day before the proposal, I learned that the new ring would not be available. Discouraged, I asked the Lord why He allowed this disruption. He reminded me of the original ring and, more importantly, that He had been the one guiding and providing for our relationship. Unknowingly, I had started to take over with the ring. God lovingly removed the distraction and provided a better solution -- and a restored perspective. On Saturday, February 6th, Rachel and I met early in the morning, just north of Boston and drove to ocean to watch the sunrise. There on Singing Beach I asked the love of my life to marry me.
Rachel: When I returned to Vermont after Christmas, Ryan told me he loved me and I Iet him know that I felt the same. We talked about our future together and getting married. But first, Ryan said he wanted to ask for my father’s permission in person. I knew my dad wasn’t returning to Vermont until my graduation in May, so I looked expectantly towards that time. (However, I prayed that we would be engaged before then!)
In the meantime, Ryan and I decided to meet every Saturday in Concord, NH, which was about half way between Rhode Island and Vermont. Thankfully, I was returning to Burlington for an internship during my final trimester, so Ryan and I would be able to spend a lot more time together.
One week Ryan suggested that we meet in Boston. Ry used to live there and wanted to show me around. (We were also getting a little tired of Concord!). I gladly took him up on his offer. We decided to meet in Woburn and drive into the city together. On the way into town, Ryan announced we were not going to watch the sunrise in Boston but on the beach. The morning was cloudy and cold and I doubted that we would be able to see the sunrise, but I could tell Ryan was very excited about going to the beach. As we were walking toward the water, Ryan handed me a digital recorder and asked me to play it. Over the past months, Ryan and I had had lots of fun recording messages for each other while we were apart. Excited to hear what he had recorded, I pressed “play.”
I heard his voice reading from the Book of Psalms about the sunrise and the ocean. Then he said, “Rachel the sun rises and sets with you.” There was a pause on the recording and then he spoke again. He told me about his trip to Texas and asking my dad if he could marry me. He told me that my dad had said “yes.” The tape recording stopped. I was stunned! I turned to see Ryan drop to one knee. He looked at me and asked, “Rachel will you marry me?” The answer was obvious: YES! Then he placed his grandmother’s ring on my finger…
TODAY
We are so excited for the adventure God has in store and so thankful for all He has done and is continuing to do. Our lives and relationship are His accomplishment and we are in awe!
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